Between Tomorrow and Eternity

The Bible talks a lot about worry and anxiety. When I finally started to pay attention to what Jesus was saying about my propensity to worry my life away, things got a lot better, not perfect, but better.

I don't worry so much about today. When I pray the Lord's Prayer, I ask God to give me my daily bread and He always has. I don't worry about eternity. After reading Randy Alcorn's book on Heaven, I'm pretty dang excited.

I do worry about tomorrow. And the day after. And ten years after that.

I worry so much about the days between tomorrow and eternity that I almost can't enjoy the right now.

I've been running the last month. I've been doing Couch to 5K and I have been able to run every workout, even as it's gotten harder. But after I finish my runs, I think, well, I won't be able to do the next one, that one is really hard. I worry about what will happen when I do finish C25k. Will I run every day? Will I immediately train for a 10k? Will I have enough time? Will I stop running? I worry.

I've been cooking for me and Tom. I cook all our meals on the weekend and make our lunches everyday. I'm doing a good job. We're eating healthy, losing weight, and I'm getting some long overdue time in the kitchen. I love doing it. But I think, I'm doing it now, but how will I keep up once we're married? I don't know if I'll be able to cook every night. Our grocery budget will be too high. I'll run out of recipes. I worry.

I'm probably the healthiest I've ever been. I've been exercising, eating right, getting eight hours of sleep every night, even taking vitamins. I feel good, really good. But I'm pretty sure I'll get cancer in a few years. I worry about the treatment, about leaving young children. I worry.

I've been reading a lot lately. I've cut out TV almost completely to make room for reading, because I know I get so much more joy out of that. I work really hard on the weekends so I have less to do on the weeknights. I come home, don't sit down, and immediately tackle all the projects for the day. The hour or two I have left I use to read. I'm reading some great books, and I'm really happy. But then I think, should I feel guilty I have this time to read? Should I keep myself more busy? I won't always have this time. How will I be happy if I don't get to read? I worry.

I could go on, but I think those are sufficient examples. My life is a happy one. I'm making better choices, I'm working hard, I'm making time for what I love. But I worry.

The Bible clearly gives us hope for today and clearly gives us hope for eternity. Does the Bible explicitly give us hope for tomorrow? The only thing that comes to mind is the passage where it says that tomorrow has it's own worries. Boy, you ain't kiddin.

One of my favorite stories in the Bible involves my favorite disciple and Jesus. Peter sees Jesus walking now water and sets out toward Him. Then the waves inevitably come. He looks at them and as soon as his eyes are no longer on Jesus, his feet  begin to sink. Jesus reaches out and saves him and asks, "Why did you doubt?"

There is so much I love about that story. I love the confidence of Peter to get out of the boat. I love the emphasis to keep our eyes turned toward Jesus. I love that Jesus wasn't angered at Peter when he failed to see Jesus as he should.

I especially love that this passage speaks of my tomorrows. Today I am looking at Jesus. Today I am healthy, today I am active, today I am productive. Tomorrow I may be all of these things, or I may be diagnosed with cancer, I may be overcome with depression, I may burn all the food for the week. But the hope for tomorrow is really the same as the hope for today and the hope for eternity: to look upon Jesus.

I can always look full in his wonderful face. The things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of his glory and grace.

But you know what? If I don't look directly at Jesus and I begin to sink into the waves, He'll catch me. I may fail at my goals, I may die from cancer. I'd rather go trusting for today, being sure in my eternity, and looking full in His wonderful face.

What is there really between today and eternity? I have today because I'm here and Go has entrusted it to me. I know that I have eternity. Tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that, is just bonus time. It is another day to choose to look at Jesus instead of the waves. Because I promise you that the waves will come. I know from firsthand experience that those waves can be devastating. To minimize the waves is laughable. To minimize Jesus is insanity. And one day, those waves will overtake you. I pray they overtake me looking at Jesus.